It all began with my stupid self trying to look 'cool' by wearing spectacles. So I continuously wore my friend's spectacles. Little did I know that I gained my own power and I had to wear it during cinemas or when in class.

It exacerbated when I came to TGB as my bed was directly facing the sunlight. I didn't have an eye mask to cover my eyes from the sun rays at that time, so it really took a huge toll on my vision (get yourself an eye mask, people!) It got so bad, I couldn't even see what my teacher wrote on the board, although I was sitting at the front row (until a few days ago).

Years passed and I'm in KTJ, and I needed the spectacles more than ever. I used it more frequently until something happened to the spectacles and I couldn't really use it because it was loose and it was scratchy all over. But I'm 19 anyway. My family made a promise to send me to a LASIK centre to get my eye done once I turned 18.

Of course I remember that promise. That's all I ever wanted. To get my vision back. 

The week has come and I have chosen to do my LASIK at Professor Muhaya Eye and LASIK Specialist Centre in Kajang. She is indeed very experience. I don't really know her as much, I do know that she is a motivator but I didn't know that my visit to her centre would change my life entirely.

After making an appointment, I went to the centre to get my eye checked. If you want to do a LASIK surgery, you have to get your eye checked first in order to ensure that your eyes are suitable to be LASIK-ed. (Yes, I created that word).

Do bear in mind that if you choose this centre, it will offer two types of surgery, one is ReLEx-Smile, which costs RM 12 600. It's a type of surgery using the highest technology the centre could offer. It also has lesser effects compared to LASIK. The second option is the normal LASIK surgery and when I did it it was RM 8000. They told me to go for the former, as I am a swimmer and the effect of the first option is that I only skip water activities for a week but for LASIK, I would have to skip for 1 month or more. Because RM 8000 already costs a bomb and I feel like I'm putting a lot of burden to my family already so I decided to stick with LASIK.

After my eye check-up. I got to meet the one and only Prof. Muhaya, as she consulted me on what type of surgery I would do. My mom was telling her how I swim and doing LASIK might effect my swimming routines; a few moments later Prof asked me 

"Why do you swim?"

"because it's a stress reliever for me"

"Why are you stressed?"

"Because I have A-Levels coming up and I need to get the grades."

"Why do you need the grades?"

"Because I need to get to the university I want to go to."
"Why do you want to go to a top university?"

"Because I want to make my mom and family proud... I don't want to disappoint them?"

"You have to stop aiming to please others. Your purpose is to please Allah, the One and Only. When you aim to please Allah's creations, it would only disappoint you. You need to have these things in you, gratefulness, sincerity, compassion and bravery."

"It's just that, I have been failing so many times."

"Mediocrity is okay. Ada hikmah di sebalik segala-galanya. Make Allah your priority. You are studying Economics to help the ummah and to become a good servant of Allah. You also have to start to forgive others. Every night, you tell yourself, that you forgive everyone who has done anything wrong to you."

"Don't worry, you will do great, I am so proud of you."

Obviously I cried like the emotional person I am. Then, I was told to watch the recent Youtube video of Yasmin Mogahed. It really is motivating. There is a speech on Youtube entitled, "You Can Overcome" which I relate so much. One of the things that she said to help overcome these negative thoughts in our head is to keep a gratitude journal. I'm trying it out and alhamdulillah, I could see some improvements in my thoughts and how I perceive life.

After the consultation, we agreed to meet on Thursday for my Lasik surgery.

On the 6th of April 2017, I woke up early feeling super jittery and nervous for the surgery.

After a few hours of waiting, they called me up and asked me to put on the surgery clothing and a shower cap look alike. There were two patients queuing for the surgery. The other guy is an Arab, looks like he's my age as well. He asked me whether I would be the first patient. I replied, "I have no idea." Later, the nurse called his name to go in first. Ha.

Then the same nurse called me into the surgery room to witness the Arab guy's eye surgery so that I do the exact same thing as the guy did. Just focus on the green light.

After his surgery is done, it was then my turn.

I was blatantly scared, but they told me to keep reciting Al-Ikhlas so it was okay. I think I had trouble opening my eyes or something. IDK. It was not painful, but it was gory. I'm just gonna spare you the details. 15 minutes later, I got up, and it was all foggy.







When I came home, it was really painful. My eyes couldn't stop from producing discharge and excess water. I called them up and they said that it's normal since my power is pretty high so my eyes are still trying to adjust. I slept the whole day after that.

The next day, I opened my eyes, my eyes are no longer that sensitive to light, and I saw everything in HD! Alhamdulillah. I couldn't believe my eyes! I don't think my eyes could believe it either! I could see what brand my air conditioner is! I could see the 99 names of Allah in the fram which is 20 m away from where I'm sitting. I can blog without using my spectacles. Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah.

Prof's last words to me were,

"After this, you are a different person. Tak payah panik-panik dah. Orang yang panik adalah orang yang rugi. Okay?"


Meeting Professor Dr Muhaya and undergoing the LASIK surgery was indeed, an eye-opening experience. Literally. InsyaAllah, I will use my eyes to increase my amalan to Allah and to give service to the ummah. I will continue to be a better person of my own self, every single day.