Of future and friendships
3:39 PM
This is super random, but I genuinely want kids. I think my mother really helped influence me in this thought. Because she was able to raise me all by herself, with the support of her family of course.
This is obviously something uncertain, I wouldn't know how I would get one. One thing for sure, it will be a halal way. But my kid will dress well, will go to dance classes, will speak well, I'll probably get him/her to try out triathlon. But whatever it is, I want the best for my kid.
I wouldn't even mind if I get an adopted child. There are so many articles about babies being thrown away, which I find so saddening. I wouldn't mind to be honest, the world is already so dark, children are not meant to have a lonely start, somewhere in the ditches. They deserve the world.
What am I saying? This is what happens when your sleeping pattern is all messed up. Sleeping at 4 to 5am, swimming every day till your body is sore, regain the calories by eating sinfully good food and get tired to even start on my essays.
Maybe since I am on Blogger, I would like to remind all my readers something.
Just because I stick to my traditional ways, it doesn't mean that I do not accept my friends who aren't. Unfortunately, some of them don't know that, so they disappear into thin air. I have been trying hard to keep in touch with a friend since last year. But the person kept avoiding me. Sometimes, I really believe in Allah's miracle and the truth was accidentally revealed.
Sometimes, I ask myself, "How can people change, but still be the same person at the same time?" I am often reminded to stay guarded and always stay true to what I believe in. When you're a young adult, you start to realise things. You start to notice that a lot of people around you will change ways, and they will not stay true to the things that they have said previously. But it doesn't mean that they are a different person. Give them a chance.
I wish people knew that I don't care about their lifestyle. Let me live my life my way, and you can live yours. All I ask is for you to be my friend. I was so lonely when I thought I've lost my friend. When the truth was revealed, that person told me, "I really do want to hang out with you, I was just afraid that you won't accept me for who I am now. I'm so glad you found out."
That is one thing I've learnt in life. You must learn to accept that people change, but that doesn't mean that they are willing to let go of their friendship with you. It just means that you have to be ready to accept them for who they are, because that is what friends are for.
I don't consider myself as having a lot of close friends. Sure I can be friendly, but I build my walls high enough that I have very very few close friends. And my mom is my only best friend. So I am really honoured when there are individuals in my life who share with me their personal stories, get out of their facade to show me who they truly are and people who are willing to travel all the way to this dead town to visit me. So thank you, thank you, thank you.
Now let me get on this essay real quick.
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