The final message my therapist had during our last meetup went,

“Right now, he still takes up space in your head, living in it rent-free. He doesn’t deserve that.”

Actually, I’d like to think the house he resides in my head has turned into a tiny little box. As we pass by, my heart doesn’t beat as intensely as it was months ago. He is now just a random person whom I occasionally pass by at the office, and soon I won’t even realise he exists. I trust not in me, but time.

One person has been in the backburner of my head over the past 6 months. Nearer to her return, I started the habit of stalking her, to gauge whether she will actually practice what she preaches. But alas, as I saw her at the corner of my Teams call, she now has an illegal 40-storey building in my head. All that peace I’ve had over the past 6 months had to be unlearned, and as I grey rock my way through this situation, I was deemed immature, and that I need to display executive maturity, at a pinnacle time where my performance is currently being measured by the big boys. 

They are definitely right, that was the bitter pill I have to swallow. Unfortunately I will have to learn to destroy that illegal building. All I know is that, I’m not alone. I have people by my side, and I will face my fear.

Breathe in,

Breathe out,

You’ll be okay.