It has always been me.

Throughout these three years of failures, I have come to a conclusion to always, always lower my expectations. Yes, you can have an expectation. But do not imagine it being exceeded or achieved. There are endless possibilities to your expectations.

Learn to go with the flow. And learn to cope quick with what happens after your expectations are not exceeded. I give you two extreme scenarios of two kinds of failures that have happened to me.

1st: Not getting into UCL

Yes, I got grades which disqualifies me an entry to my dream school. What happens next? Remark? At the same time, get a new financial affidavit, change address in TB test do this, do that. 

Solution: Do everything as listed. Have no Plan B? Ask around, there may be more people who are in the same situation than you think.

You can't just expect things to happen on their own. I'm just really glad I had good support system throughout this hard mess. Thanks mom.

2nd: failing stats test

Yup. I also failed my statistics test, which accumulates into my exam marks. What do I do next? Do I cry with my friend? Do we figure out what went wrong? Do we work harder, even if we have the tiniest little faith?

Solution: Yes, yes you do work as much as you could. Alhamdulillah, I got first class for Statistics. (but I fucked up the rest tho lol)

but its okay though. 

I have come to realize everyone has a different life story. We are in no position to compare our lives to theirs. So it is okay, to focus the energy on ourselves. To always think about the betterment of ourselves. And for our family and friends, of course. Here is something that I've come across on Facebook which should be kept in mind at all times.

No more fucking up. Time to grind. Honestly can't wait to get things right in second year.