I was soooo close to deleting my Instagram again, until I received a text from her asking me about my day. My friend and I continued telling each other things we are grateful for every day. There are days where we don’t see what we are grateful for, but as we tell each other how our days went, one of us would point out, “hey, that’s a blessing in itself!” And I find that so beautiful, MasyaAllah.”

Lilly Sabri released a second lockdown guide, which means that my buddy system is pretty much still active. It’s the third week of trying to eat healthily, but there are days where I would eat high calorie foods, but Linda Sun’s words comforted me as she tells her viewers not to ignore hunger cues. Besides, I bake cookies/ cookie dough to spend quality time with my family. In a way, that helps my wellbeing. And I eat things in moderation now, so, it should be okay. I must be able to keep up with this healthy eating momentum while I can.

I will forever be grateful that despite my circumstances,  Allah has given me the opportunity to work with the best managers, especially in my very first full-time job. They are understanding and friendly, and I can slowly ease myself into showing my personality, and by being myself more.

Now, it’s time for me to check in on my friends. Perhaps I feel a little better, I hope they are all okay.

I talk a lot about my relationship with people, and how I care about them. But what about the relationship I have with myself? It’s still a work in progress. My mind is unfortunately still very cruel towards myself, and it’s hurting me. But self-growth is a journey, there’s no end game here. We keep evolving. So I shall do that.